|“What hitting that ball has taught me is that no matter how much I want to STRATEGIZE the swing, what really matters is how connected I FEEL to myself in the moment and how much I allow for flow to guide me.|
|I wanted to share something incredibly powerful with you, something that I believe can truly support and inspire you!|
A couple of years ago, Arabia introduced me to golf. Now, I have to admit, for the longest time I thought golf was a simple and somewhat boring sport. Just hitting a ball and waiting for it to find its way into a hole? How wrong I was! It didn’t take long for me to realize that golf is an incredibly challenging sport that demands both physical and mental strength.
But you know what I love most about golf? It’s the level of presence it requires from me to truly control the ball. You see, one of my biggest life challenges is learning to “release control.” I’m an energetic leader (as you already know) with service flowing through my veins. Ensuring that everything goes exactly as I want it to be is a quirk I’ve struggled with. Growing up in an environment that demanded perfection of me, becoming a control freak became my shield, protecting me from potential rejection by my parents, bullying at school, and all the vulnerabilities that came with it.
However, there are times when I can’t help but embrace my control freak side (and yes, I love myself for it). So, when I first started playing golf, I wanted to know everything about ball strategy, creating the perfect swing, and the precise positions I should adopt. But here’s what I discovered: while all of that is important, the most crucial element for a great swing is FLOW.
Yes, flow. I have realized that the more relaxed I am, the less I overthink it, and the better I perform. Hitting that ball has taught me that no matter how much I strategize my swing, what truly matters is how connected I feel in the present moment and how much I allow myself to flow. The more present I am, the better my swing becomes, as if my body instinctively knows what to do. Only by releasing control can I enable it to perform at its best.
It’s fascinating to me how many parallels I find between golf and life. Have you ever experienced a situation where you had to let go of the need to be in control and simply surrender? And when you did, did things somehow magically fall into place and get resolved? It’s almost as if events had a mind of their own!
Here’s what I’ve learned: we can be both participants and observers of life. We can strategize, plan, and have a vision of the direction we want to take. But the real magic happens when we learn to flow with the present moment, when we practice acceptance of what is, and when we step back and allow things to unfold naturally.
Now, here’s the million-dollar question: How do we do that?
Well, I believe it all comes down to one thing: trust.
Trusting that, no matter what, everything is well.
Trusting that EVERYTHING is ALWAYS working in your favor, even when it doesn’t feel like it or seem like it.
TRUSTING that deep down inside, you always have ALL you need and more.
I believe our need for control stems from our childhood experiences. As kids, we aren’t always taught that we will be taken care of unconditionally. We aren’t reassured that we will be loved no matter what! And this happens because our parents, too, may not feel safe. Because they don’t trust their parents or their environment, they don’t know how to teach us how to trust.
For me, trust has been the most challenging lesson I’ve had to learn (and if I’m honest, I’m still learning). However, what truly helped me was understanding that trust doesn’t depend on anything or anyone else but myself. No external factor can give me the reassurance and peace I need to feel safe and to TRUST that I’ll be okay no matter what. The only source of that trust resides within me.
Knowing that I have myself, that I am my home, and that I possess everything I need has given me the courage to take risks, be vulnerable, release control, and surrender to the present moment. I trust that whatever happens is always for my benefit. I trust that my life has a higher intelligence, a mind of its own, that knows better than I do. So, I simply let go and allow it to guide me.
This is what learning to play golf has reminded me of and giving myself the opportunity to learn it, fail at it (haha), and figure it out has made me a better player both in golf and in life! and has helped me to enjoy the game of life so much more! at the end of the day, it’s all about finding the sweet spot, the right combination between dong and being, and TRUSTING that everything will fall into place!
I wanted to share this with you because we are surrounded by opportunities to learn, to grow, and to heal our wounds. My wish for everyone in this world is that they embrace their own journey of self-discovery and trust, allowing themselves to surrender control and experience the beautiful magic that unfolds as a result.
With love and trust,
|Resilience, my dear friend, isn’t just about turning chaos and breakdowns into life lessons and breakthroughs. It’s about keeping your soul intact throughout the process. It’s about continuing to believe when all seems lost, maintaining trust when it feels like the end, and finding joy and smiles in moments overshadowed by fear and uncertainty.|
|Have you ever found yourself wishing you could be in two places at once? Have you ever faced a situation where you had to trust the process, even when you couldn’t take direct action? That was exactly how these last two weeks unfolded for me. It was a whirlwind of emotions testing me to my very core!,|
In the LOUD Incubator, I teach women the invaluable skill of living the path of “YES/AND” – accepting reality as it is while allowing ourselves to experience the emotions it brings. I have experienced this many times throughout my life, but let me tell you, these past few weeks I was put to the ultimate test of this philosophy.
While having two speaking events and conducting LOUD Circle immersions (quarterly transformational trainings from my LOUD Women Nation platform), my boyfriend ended up in the hospital battling with some health issues. It was a gut-wrenching situation. The same week he was supposed to be my partner in facilitating the trainings, he found himself needing to prioritize his own well-being, spending nearly two weeks confined to the hospital bed. And let’s not forget, it was also the final week of school. I had to juggle the demands of being a mother to my two daughters, attending to their needs, running them to activities, shows, and summer camps – you name it.
All of this while my heart ached for my boyfriend, dealing with the uncertainty of his stuation, uncertain about what the future held for us. It felt like my world was spinning out of control!!! Yet, amidst the chaos and the storm, his resilience shone through. His presence, his unwavering spirit, and his authenticity inspired me to dig deeper within myself.
I was on the verge of canceling everything. But he asked me not to give up. He reminded me that it is precisely in moments of adversity that we discover our hidden strength and spirit. He assured me that my purpose would not only sustain me but fill my cup, even amidst the pain and uncertainty we were facing. And he was right. Oh, how he was right.
We made it through, against all odds. I stood before two audiences of over 300 women, pouring my heart out and igniting the fire of LOUDNESS within them. I guided the incredible women in the LOUD Circle through a weekend of transformation, delving deep into the essence of authenticity. And while all this was happening, I still managed to be there for my daughters, tending to their every need, and caring for my boyfriend when he was finally released from the hospital.
Let me tell you, those past two weeks, especially that wild weekend, left me completely drained. Yesterday, I found myself exhausted and all I could do was take deep breaths and connect with GRATITUDE. Gratitude for simply being alive, for finding the strength to carry on, and for having a purpose that runs so deeply within me. In that moment, I once again came face to face with my inner strength and resilience.
As I sat there, lost in meditation, a quote from Wayne Dyer reverberated through my soul: “Don’t die with your music within you.” This weekend, more than ever, I realized the profound truth embedded within those words. I discovered the power that emanates from living your purpose, even when the storm is raging around you, when you feel like you can’t possibly take another step forward. Witnessing my boyfriend endure so much, yet still radiating strength, motivated me to tap into my own reserves of courage and share my purpose with the world, louder than ever before.
Resilience, my dear friend, isn’t just about turning chaos and breakdowns into life lessons and breakthroughs. It’s about keeping your soul intact throughout the process. It’s about continuing to believe when all seems lost, maintaining trust when it feels like the end, and finding joy and smiles in moments overshadowed by fear and uncertainty.
These past few weeks have been an incredible journey. My boyfriend’s graceful resilience has been a masterclass in vulnerability and strength. Through his unwavering spirit, I experienced a newfound freedom – The one that comes when you find PEACE in your soul, that does NOT depend on outside circumstances and allows you to rise above the challenges, and, despite the storm, share your purpose with unbridled passion…. AND allows you to feel it ALL.. while still moving forward in your life.
I firmly believe that our stories, our triumphs, and our lessons are meant to be shared.
By being LOUD with our story we can inspire others, to help them grow, thrive, and transform. That’s why I choose vulnerability and to pour my heart out to you today.
May you always find the strength to take that one extra step – the step that leads you to a life where you embrace and live out your purpose. The one that allows you to rise above what you thought was your limit. May you tap into the music that lies deep within your soul and, without hesitation, share it LOUDLY with the world.
Trust me when I say, the world needs it now more than ever.
|What I have learned throughout my life and all the times I have failed, crashed and burned is that IMPACT can be measured in many different ways, and the way you decide to measure it can define how close or far away you feel from your success.|
|This is me…. Last Friday, May 5th….. I found myself standing in a room full of open hearts, sharing with them the lesson that I believe is the key to happiness: Always Be Yourself.|
When I left the stage, my entire body was vibrating SO HIGH, SO STRONG that I KNEW in my heart I was fully connected with my life’s purpose.
This experience reminded me of a conversation I had with a client last year, who was feeling exhausted and ready to give up on her small business. No matter how hard she tried, there was always something else to achieve, and she felt like there was no space to celebrate her wins. It was as if she was in a hamster wheel, always chasing the new win, the new challenge, and that made her exhausted.
As a business owner, I know firsthand how hard and scary this path can be, and my heart went out to her. I asked her what success meant to her, and she replied, “Impact! The impact I create in others, changing lives! I want to be able to help others see their potential and live better lives…” She didn’t care about money but was here for the impact. I used to feel the same way.
So, I took a pause and asked her:
What happens if the IMPACT that you want is not as BIG as you want it?
What are you using to measure impact??
How can we really measure it?
She didn’t know what to say…
And, you see… this was my problem for many years.
For a long time, I held myself back by measuring impact based on its size. I had always pictured myself in a big stadium full of thousands (or even millions) of people singing my songs with peace in their hearts. While I still sometimes dream about that moment, I also realized that this same image was holding me down. I had become so focused on that one goal that I was missing what was happening in the here and now. I had created a connection between impact and size, which made me feel like something was always missing. THAT same goal made me operate from lack over and over again. My career became a rat race always searching for the next success, the next opportunity, the bigger stage… just like she was feeling in the moment of our conversation.
What I have learned throughout my life and all the times I have failed, crashed and burned is that IMPACT can be measured in many different ways, and the way you decide to measure it can define how close or far away you feel from your success.
After years of searching for that big image, I asked myself: What is it that I really want?
The answer was clear: I wanted to be myself.
I wanted to write what my heart wanted, sing what my heart wanted, and do what I loved the most. I realized that I had become so focused on the size of my impact that I had lost sight of its true source: THE MOMENT.
Because I was focused on the MILLIONS of people I wanted to impact, my road got derailed, and I started searching the Size and not the source!
When I shared this story with my client, she did a deep dive into all the people she was already impacting in THAT moment and realized that she was extremely successful. Her whole demeanor changed, her energy shifted, and she started feeling good enough and worthy. The very next month, she landed a client who paid her double the amount she used to charge, and even though it was only one person, she was feeling the impact she was making in her life.
When I think about impact I think about my clients, melting down in front of me and sharing their deepest darkest secrets, and wanting to heal from their pain and still believing their lives can be different… THAT is impact..Their COURAGE impacts ME, inspires ME to keep seeing beyond the darkness, to keep seeking beyond the pain and to find the root of what makes us human, our authenticity.
To me, impact is being able to be myself, raw and vulnerable, on a stage in front of however many people are there. Without any costume, mask, or pretending to be someone else.
Just being ME!
There is nothing better in this world than being yourself. It requires no effort, is free, and it will give you joy and energy instead of taking it away. This is true not just professionally, but also in relationships, in the community, as a parent, and with yourself. If you can’t or don’t know how to connect with your truth, seek support.
I promise you that a life in complete authenticity will be the best gift you will ever give to yourself.
|Reconnecting with our inner child and this pure voice that we have had hidden for so long is step one of becoming authentic. And no, it’s not easy. It’s a process that requires a lot of strength and courage. It’s shadow work! But once we do it, we can experience the most amazing freedom in the world. I promise you, there is nothing like it.|
|My dear, |
Last week In our LOUD Incubator, a mastermind group that is part of my LOUD Women Nation membership, I taught the women how to reconnect with their inner child so that they can rediscover their truth.
You see, our pure selves are still intact within our inner child. Everything that we are, sometimes dormant and sometimes very strong, is within us. It really depends on how we have lived our lives and how our environment has either kept us connected to our truth or disconnected us from it with expectations, stereotypes, and judgments.
The reason why I believe it’s super important to reconnect with our inner child and why It was the first part of our class is that it’s where our true selves lie – our true needs, wants, and who we really are. What I realized is that some women in my program, when they connect to their inner child through our exercise, could totally feel their inner child and remember what was so important for them, almost like they were there once more. But some women had a very hard time remembering because they were raised in environments that caused them a lot of pain from a very early age, and they were forced to “grow up” or put on a mask with survival patterns to survive their environment.
Connecting with our inner child is probably one of the most critical steps in the path of our authenticity, and here is why:
As we grow up, outside expectations, family judgments, societal labels, and stereotypes will force us to change, tame, or shrink our personality so that we can fulfill our human need for connection and belonging. Unfortunately, there is not a lot of emotional education in our schools (yet) and probably our parents were not taught to honor themselves either. So, the only way they knew how to love us was to teach us how to “change – to be accepted.”
But what many of us don’t know is that that change is very painful. It’s like cutting a piece of who we are from our body, an arm, a leg. That change will force us to hide our real selves, to lock it up in a box, and pretend to be someone we are not, just so we can “survive.”
And I know what you might be thinking: “survive?? I never had any situation where I felt I was going to die!! Survive is a big word”… YES I say “survive” because for a child, to feel not accepted, not loved for who they are or rejected, is a near-death experience, just as if someone was putting a gun to your head today.
This is trauma.
Trauma will make us change who we are for the “character” that we must be to be accepted and feel safe. As time passes by, as we become adults, we build on top of this character our life, and the decisions we make are based on this character, not on what we want. We build a life that serves this character’s “agenda”… and all to survive.
I have been working in personal development for over ten years now, and one of the things that I find fascinating is how we will do anything to protect this inauthentic life, this character. We will fight for it, convince ourselves that this is who we are and this is what we want.
But in the background, our true voice is still calling us, asking us to see her, to save her. We might pretend that we don’t see this true voice, but it might manifest in anxiety, fears, self-sabotage, physical illnesses, depression – you name it.
So, reconnecting with our inner child and this pure voice that we have had hidden for so long is step one of becoming authentic. And no, it’s not easy. It’s a process that requires a lot of strength and courage. It’s shadow work! But once we do it, we can experience the most amazing freedom in the world. I promise you, there is nothing like it.
I know this too well.
I experienced it myself.
When I started my singing career, I was convinced that it was my life’s purpose. I had devoted my childhood and adolescent years to pursuing this dream, sacrificing my social life and other aspirations. However, in retrospect, I realize that what I truly wanted was acceptance and validation.
As a child, I was bullied at school relentlessly for years. To survive, I created a strategy
that allowed me to feel safe while I was going through the bullying years: I became
the teacher’s pet and sought out authority figures to avoid rejection.
Now I realize that becoming a famous singer seemed like the perfect way to gain power and make everyone like me. In my subconscious, I believed that as long as I was famous and powerful, no one could hurt me, and I would be loved by everyone.
But at that time, I didn’t realize the price I was paying for this. I was only expressing a small fractionof my true self, while silencing the rest. It was an excruciatingly painful way
The day I released my first album and became a #1 billboard artist, I thought I had
achieved my dream. Yet, I still felt empty, afraid, and small. Through my
healing process I realized that I had built a life that protected the “character”
I had created to shield myself from rejection and bullying. My true self knew
then that I needed to break free from this and rediscover who I truly was.
That’s when everything fell apart!
It was during this process that I reconnected with my inner child and discovered other
beautiful gifts that my voice was yearning to share. These were parts of me
that I had silenced and hidden away for years. And this rediscovery led me to
develop my LOUD method, which has helped thousands of people heal, change their
lives, cure their cancer, save their marriage, find their purpose, Etc.
Imagine if I had never allowed myself to break free from the life of inauthenticity that I
had created. Imagine all the people I would not have been able to help. It was
a painful journey, but it was necessary for me to rediscover my true self and
my true voice.
So, my message to you today is this: Remember who you are. Remember your voice. Heal
your wounds, break your silence, and be LOUD! Your voice is needed, and it
contains faith. It is here to serve. You are needed, and I promise you, the
world is waiting for you.
|My body was slowly dying because I was not being authentic.|
I was disconnected from my true self, voice, and core of energy.
Reconnecting with my voice was a necessity to life!
It was the core of life.
|One night, I woke up in terror, drenched in sweat, with a knowing that I was dying. I had no idea if it was a sickness, heart attack, or an intuition that something terrible was going to happen. The feeling was so strong that it was undeniable. It was the point of no return for me.|
I got out of bed, knelt down, and prayed to God to let me live to see my daughter grow up. I begged Him to show me why I was feeling this way. I was miserable, and my body was screaming at me to stop.
I had everything I ever wanted, yet I was unhappy. Why was I dying?
The answer eluded me, but I knew that if I didn’t change something, I would die. I prayed for a sign from God to show me what I needed to do to survive. And the sign came within the first four hours of the next day.
I was walking on the beach, looking out at the ocean, when something powerful happened inside me. I realized that I wasn’t in love with my husband. I had been living on autopilot, disconnected from my feelings, wants, desires, and joy. I was passing through life, not living it.
My lack of vitality was killing me, and every decision I made was for others, not for me.
I was living a life that served an agenda I created long ago to feel needed, supported, and loved. But 11 years later, my heart said enough. Living in denial is a powerful mechanism of protection, and I had been living in denial for years because I was too afraid to see what I really wanted. I built my life based on the role I took when I was a teenager, after my suicide attempt. I met my husband, decided to survive, and built a family, a career, and external circumstances that would become proof of my worthiness and my permission to be here. I forgot to love myself and decided to build monuments and proof of that love outside of myself, forgetting to listen to my own voice.
After the truth bomb hit me, I ran to see my best friend, who asked me a powerful question that changed my life. She asked me to rate my level of authenticity from 1 to 10 with my family, husband, daughter, business, community, and clients. I thought it was a stupid question because I believed I was doing everything to be happy. But as I tried to fill out the list, I realized I didn’t know what authenticity truly meant. It was then that I realized that my prayer the morning before was being answered.
My body was slowly dying because I was not being authentic.
I was disconnected from my true self, voice, and core of energy.
Reconnecting with my voice was a necessity to life!
It was the core of life.
When we build a life based on inauthenticity, we disconnect our body from the vibration of life, shield it with fear, pain, shame, guilt, etc. Our bodies will vibrate low, and our whole system will suffer. Emotionally, mentally, and physically, we will perish. Building a life based on someone we are not can be very detrimental to our lives.
Today, I want to invite you to create your own checklist! Give yourself this gift. HOW AUTHENTIC ARE YOU??
Creating an authenticity checklist can be a powerful tool in identifying areas of our lives where we may not be fully expressing our true selves. Start by making a list of all the areas in your life where you feel you may be hiding your truth or not fully expressing yourself. This could include relationships with family, friends, romantic partners, or colleagues, as well as situations at work, in social settings, or even in your own personal hobbies and interests.
Once you have identified these areas, ask yourself some important questions.
-Am I showing up authentically in these situations, or am I putting on a facade to please others or fit in?
-Am I expressing my true feelings, beliefs, and values, or am I holding back out of fear of judgment or rejection?
-Am I living a life that is aligned with my authentic self, or am I sacrificing my true desires and aspirations to meet the expectations of others?
By answering these questions honestly, you can begin to uncover the areas of your life where you may be disconnected from your truth. From there, you can start taking small steps to bring more authenticity into your life.
Remember, living authentically is a journey, and it takes courage to break free from the expectations of others and embrace your true self. But in doing so, you can unlock a greater sense of fulfillment, joy, and connection in all areas of your life.
Being authentic is an act of self-love, breaking our silence and allowing our voices to be LOUD.
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|Growth often feels uncomfortable because it requires us to face our old beliefs and decide who it is we want to be.|
|Do you believe that growth is something you deserve? |
It’s common for my 1:1 clients to make a bold move and sign up for my hypnosis programs, only to second guess themselves after the fact. Ultimately they are able to see that this is their fear surfacing and trust their decision, but this is often the first test in the journey of saying “no more” to their former selves.
This has also happened to me. Two years ago, I moved into my dream apartment in Ft. Lauderdale and like most moves, this has had its own challenges.
When these challenges surfaced, I noticed that old stories about money and self-worth wanted to re-emerge.
You see, I’ve spent the last seven years healing my relationship with money and believing in my own self worth. Seven years ago I was at my lowest point. I faced eviction, bankruptcy, a mountain of debt and car repossession for myself and my family.
It took years of work to believe I deserved abundance and financial peace.
And every level of growth has required me to believe in myself even when external circumstances wanted me to believe otherwise.
But I choose to believe that I am worthy of joy, abundance, and peace. I choose to make decisions from a place of trust instead of fear.
Can you trust the new person who wants to emerge?
Can you trust that you are creating a new way of being?
Growth often feels uncomfortable because it requires us to face our old beliefs and decide who it is we want to be.
It’s easy to want to revert to old patterns because those feel safe and comfortable.
Creating a new you, starts with trusting. It’s about taking that first step and embracing the growth you deserve. And when old patterns begin to emerge, you choose to stay centered and focus on the new story you are creating.
What story are you willing to let go of so you can create a new reality?